EveryDay

Letter to my mom on her 60th birthday

As I walk in through the front door, I automatically feel the warmth. It fogs up my glasses; it unfreezes my fingers and my toes. I can smell the soup or the stew or whatever is cooking in the kitchen and fogging up the windows. And here she comes – walking fast, her hands in the air, careful not to touch anything with her cooking fingers. She gives me kisses “ah des belles joues froides”, she repeats. She waits for me to take off my jacket and takeoff my boots and I follow her back to the kitchen. I’m suddenly starving. Pots are bubbling, the counter is cluttered with onions, tomatoes, carrots and cutting boards. Mmm that looks good, can I taste? As my hand is already grabbing a piece of meat, she says no that’s for the dog! The radio is on and we can hear the soothing voice of Garrison Keillor telling us a story about Lake Wobegon – where the men are good looking, the women are strong and the children are above average. This is how many evenings have started at home with my mom.

The door is always open, there is always enough food for all of our friends to stay for dinner, for the day or for the week end. Tu es une vraie maman! You’ve always gathered all of us and all of our friends together and showed us the true meaning of family and for that, we thank you!

I am not done being a daughter. I use to think you could only be a mother if you knew everything. Hold every answer. I have always been in awe at how much my mom knows and remembers. No other mom could beat her at Jeopardy. To this day I still call her about everything. How many milliliters in a cup again? Which one is the baking powder? The engine light in my car is on, what should I do? Sometimes when I lift my arm, my stomach hurts.. She has endless answers. I can’t imagine having to answer my own daughter, without having my mom on speed dial.

I know I haven’t always been the easiest daughter to live with, I was, to put it lightly, a teenager with an attitude, read: a bit of a bitch. I will always remember one of our “arguments” where you just stopped, looked at me, smiled and said “I can’t wait for you to have a daughter”. My life choices still give you minor heart attacks, but after long conversations and much convincing, you always end up supporting me no matter what, and the best part is that you continue to encourage me through it all. You’ve encouraged all 3 of us to follow our passion, our instincts and not to settle. To work hard, but to have fun! You’ve shown us that money is important of course, but being happy about what we do with our lives matters more. I know you might be kicking yourself about that one.. if only we would have loved to become doctors or lawyers! But instead, you have 2 extremely talented and creative sons and ME!  You’ve embraced your daughters in law and you care for them as your own.

Now you are going to be a grand mom, which is, to put it simply, the most amazing thing ever!

We know you didn’t want us to make a big fuss over your 60^th birthday, but we wanted you to be surrounded by the people you love, by the things you love and even the food you love. We wanted to thank you and let you know that we LOVE you. Bonne Fete maman!

Engaging kids. An optimistic/simplistic point of view from a young woman trying to figure out her role as an active citizen of the world

There is this perpetual social commentary about youth and kids and how they are lazy and apathetic, about how we are creating an even more individualistic society as everybody is living online. There is a social panic that kids will grow up to be unhealthy, unsociable, greedy, over consuming adults who can’t spell. I’m not going to lie, I sometimes get discouraged about what I hear and see, but then again I don’t have kids or hang around them. My first real experience of interacting with children was in Burkina Faso, my neighbors and the girls on my street would come by and we would chat, sometimes they would sing or draw for me. These kids don’t have much, they go to school, they don’t always eat enough, they care for each other and they help their parents in terms of work. They play outside with anything they can find, they fight, they scream, they cry, but they are kind, happy, and fun - I fell in love with them. Last week, I had the opportunity to talk to a class of 6^th graders in Laval about my experience in Burkina Faso. The idea of talking to privileged kids about some of the realities faced by their peers in BF was a daunting one. What if they didn’t care? However, my hope that these kids would be interested and drawn in came true. I was able to raise some kind of awareness about a part of this big amazing world we live in, about cultural differences, poverty and young women’s issues. They listened and asked great questions. They left the class wide eyed and one after another came to see me, to thank me or to tell me how interesting their afternoon had been. I’m passionate about transferring passion. It is incredibly important to be moved by something in order to take action. When I asked them what they could do here to make a change towards ending poverty and injustice in the world, they shouted out a bunch of great ideas and I also got the best answer I could have asked for. A 12 year old student raised her hand and said that it was by listening to people like me, by asking questions, by continuing to learn and seeking to understand the world that one could start to make a difference. Knowledge as the basis for action.

I decided to write this post, because I read the following article this week: After Recess: change the world

There are many campaigns these days about teaching empathy to children- how to make them care and become active citizens. It might be laziness, cynicism, feeling overwhelmed, or the fear of stepping out of the constraints of comfort, but I am a firm believer that by fostering knowledge, transferring passion, encouraging curiosity and knowledge and by creating tools youth can use to affect change, they are more likely to develop into active citizens and involved adults.

Inspiration

I haven’t written in a while. I haven’t felt inspired or lived anything worth writing about. The whole point of this blog, however, was to find beauty and inspiration in the Every Day and write about it. I had to remind myself that life is made up of moments and at the end, we remember the ones that shifted us in one way or another. I had forgotten where or how to find those moments in a “regular” life -like the one I am slipping back into. Regular doesn’t imply boring, it implies comfort and in my case, rediscovering my city on the brinks of winter, reconnecting with friends and family and redefining my place and my role in this world. I’ve been seeking out inspiration by walking all over Montreal, by going to the top of Mount Royal with my brother and his dog, looking over the city and shouting “Hello Montreal, I’m back! You look pretty!” By going to see Bon Iver and The National play mesmerizing, can’t stop smiling concerts. By making soup and cookies to share. By freezing my toes with great company at a ski hill. By decorating a Christmas tree while sipping mulled wine with hilarious friends. By reconnecting with my forward thinking, change making colleagues at Apathy is Boring. By keeping in touch with my friends in Burkina- you continually inspire me. By reading articles such as this one. By watching videos such as these ones and this one. By reading, by talking, by dreaming and it turns out, by stopping, writing and sharing.

Read this week in the Montreal Mirror Dec. 8 to 14 edition – The Freewill Astrology by Rob Brezsny

“Not to dream boldly may turn out to be irresponsible,” said educator George Leonard. I certainly think that will be true for you in the coming months, Taurus. In my astrological opinion, you have a sacred duty not only to yourself, but also to the people you care about, to use your imagination more aggressively and expressively as you contemplate what might lie ahead of you. You simply cannot afford to remain safely ensconced within your comfort zone, shielded from the big ideas and tempting fantasies that have started calling and calling and calling you.

I agree.